Recently, I watched a short film called “A Seizure by Nathan Jones”.It briefly shows what it is like to have a grand mal seizure through Nathan’s eyes.As a person who has had multiple grand mal seizures, I was
astounded at how similar his experience was to my own.
I usually have an aura just a few seconds before I pass out.My aura is a loud ringing, hollow sounds, or sometimes I hear multiple voices. I always try and fight it, I tell everyone to “shut up” so I can battle what is about to happen to me. Then I put my arms out, ready to fight!
Well…fighting it usually doesn’t work. I never win. Without my control my head, left arm, and body turns to the right…and my eyes roll into the back of my head. Bam! The last thing I feel is my lungs tighten and I can’t get in any oxygen.To everyone else this sounds like a loud distinctive scream…
My brain has been overloaded. I cannot describe what happens during those few minutes. Even though my eyes are “open” I don’t remember seeing anything during the seizure. I shake all over.My lips and my body turns blue…I cannot breathe. I choke on my spit and blood from biting my tongue.Without the help of someone turning me on my side, I know I could die.But I can’t ask for help.
When the shaking stops, my body is weak. My face is bloodshot from the lack of oxygen.I start to breathe heavily, it sounds as if I am snoring.If someone is there with me I can hear them tell me I just had a seizure, and everything will be ok. If a person is not there telling me, I don’t know what just happened. It feels as if I am dreaming, but I'm not.
I feel pain all over now. Every muscle has been convulsing as if I had been lifting weights for hours without stopping.My spine has been twisted and my scoliosis hurts so bad that it takes weeks to recover. I can speak a little now, and the ones who watch over me look so scared, I still did not understand why… it will be hours before I will.
My wife recorded a video documentary before I had a brain resection surgery. Below you can see what it is like for me to have side-effects from my medications and have seizures. The last section shows what a grand mal seizure is like for me.It is a graphic video… so my face has been blocked during the GTC since it is so hard for her to see me turn blue.
Also, check out A Seizure by Nathan Jones.Every seizure is different, but his video will give you a pretty good idea what it is like having a grand mal if you have never had one yourself.If you have had a seizure before, tell me what it was like for you!